So that was quite a memorable Memorial Day weekend. Early Sunday morning I caught the very end of the Monaco Grand Prix, the winner of which was Jenson Button. After hearing his name I couldn’t help but think of the movie “The Curious Case of Benjamin Button” and how much I’ve always wanted to go to Monaco. Then I started thinking about how cool it would be to travel around the world to cover Formula 1 racing. I think that’s the one aspect of Formula 1 racing I like the best. I know men drool over the cars and all that but it just seems really boring to me. The cars are ginormous and the field always seems to be spread out. NASCAR just offers more… action. Anway, one thing I can say about Jenson is that his website is adorable. I love his logo! Someone make me a logo that cool.

The second race of the day was the Indianapolis 500. My hope was behind Marco Andretti and then on the very first lap he got screwed by Mario Moraes. It was at that very moment that I decided I would never ever try to pick someone to win a race ever again. So irritating. My heart broke for Marco. It’s one thing to lose it on the last lap, at least you were still in it, but to go through all of that preparation and not even get a chance really start anything. It’s just tough.

I know that Helio Castroneves’ win was emotional and it meant a lot because of his whole tax evasion aquittal, but it left me kinda cold? I’m happy for the guy, really, but I dunno, I just wanted to see something new. He’d already won the thing twice, give someone else a turn! Ha! That sounded like something you’d hear on an elementary school playground. Anywho, it was cool that Danica Patrick finished third. I think I understand her a little bit better after that pre-race piece ESPN on ABC did on her and her father. I think I understand her motives for keeping her feelings underwraps and trying to not be vulnerable.

A couple things I learned whilst watching the Indy500: 1.) Scott Dixon’s wife is pregnant! 2.) Ryan Hunter-Reay is engaged to marry to Robby Gordon’s sister, Beccy. The fact that I didn’t know either of these things show exactly how much attention I put towards IndyCar wives & girlfriends.

So after the Indy 500 show was over I changed the channel to FOX for NASCAR’s Coca-Cola 600 coverage. Little did I know that I wouldn’t find out who would win this notoriously long race a day later, with only a little over half of the race actually completed. It wasn’t NASCAR’s fault that they couldn’t run the full race, the weather just wasn’t cooperating, but it’s so annoying.

I’m happy for David Reutimann and Michael Waltrip Racing in general that they’ve received they’re first win, but I hate that it had to come under such lame circumstances.

Between yesterday and today I was witness to the world’s longest post-race show that included a stupid talking cartoon gopher (and his friends!) and fake grades for each race team that participates in NASCAR. You know those teams that they gave a C- to really deserved an F. They just wanted to be “nice” so that they could walk through the garage without getting dirty looks.

I couldn’t wait for them to just call the race already, I gave up on seeing a full race the moment they showed Carl Edwards walking around in jeans and a polo.

The only redeeming moment of the day came when Tony Stewart called the bald crew member from Reutimann’s team Billy Bad Butt. That was awesome and oh so very hilarious. I want to know why the guy felt the need to get in the middle of a conversation that Tony was having with David. Why don’t they have a microphone on Tony Stewart at all times?!

Dear Jimmie, What is going on with your hair these days? You have a super fashionable wife, can’t she take you to a proper salon in NYC and get your ‘do done? I mean, c’mon. Go talk to Sally Hershberger, she’s done great things for celebs like John Mayer, Roger Federer and Tom Cruise (to name a few!). She could really hook you up. XO – Valli

Jimmie Johnson, sporting a new haircut, jokes with Hendrick Motorsports teammate Jeff Gordon during practice for the Coca-Cola 600. Each driver has three wins in the historic race. (Photo Credit: Geoff Burke/Getty Images for NASCAR)

He would.

Team owner Jack Roush inspects spark plugs in the garage during practice for the Coca-Cola 600 at Lowe’s Motor Speedway. (Photo Credit: Geoff Burke/Getty Images for NASCAR)

Soooo adorable!!! I love this photo.

A group of kids enjoy some Domino’s pizza while waiting out the rain delay at Lowe’s Motor Speedway. (Photo Credit: Streeter Lecka/Getty Images for NASCAR)

Team owner Michael Waltrip and winning crew chief Rodney Childers hug after the Coca-Cola 600 was called and Reutimann was declared the race winner. The win was the first in the NASCAR Sprint Cup Series for Michael Waltrip Racing. (Photo Credit: Geoff Burke/Getty Images for NASCAR)

The Coca-Cola 600 was stopped just short of 3 p.m. ET to observe the National Moment of Remembrance. The cars lined up on the frontstretch and shut down the engines and crew members lined up the length of pit road to honor members of the military. (Photo Credit: Jason Smith/Getty Images)

Olympic Gold Medalist and Dancing With the Stars winner Shawn Johnson learns how to change a tire before the Coca-Cola 600 at Lowe’s Motor Speedway. (Photo Credit: Streeter Lecka/Getty Images for NASCAR)

Some things I think you should know:

– Congratulations to ESPN/ABC pit reporter Brienne Pedigo and her husband, actor Tyler Christopher of ABC’s General Hospital. The couple is expecting their first child in October! You might have already known that but it’s the first I’d heard of it. Anywhoo, In an effort to help Brienne out in her job as her pregnancy progresses ESPN thought of everything:

To assist her in performing her duties through ABC’s five-race schedule of IndyCar Series events, ESPN worked with manufacturer Impact to produce a special firesuit for her to wear as she works the pits during the races. The suit is equipped with a stretch gusset in the back so that it can be expanded as her pregnancy progresses.

Look for Brienne tomorrow during ABC’s coverage of the Indy 500. Okay, to give you more information than you really need, Tyler Christoper plays Nikolas Cassadine on General Hospital and before he married Brienne, he was married to Desperate Housewives actress Eva Longoria who is now married to professional basketball player Tony Parker. Whew.

– World champion gymnast and Dancing With The Stars winner Shawn Johnson will be the Honorary Race Official for the Coca-Cola 600 at Lowe’s Motor Speedway tomorrow. She’s already started the weekend off by riding along with Coca-Cola Racing Family member Kyle Petty. It looks like Shawn was able to show Kyle some dance moves. I think that if Carl Edwards wins the race tomorrow Shawn should run out to his car and do a back flip with him.

– Eddie Bell, a firefighter and small business owner from Tulsa, Oklahoma is the winner of the Office Depot “At The Speed of Smart” sweepstakes. As a result of his win Eddie had the awesome the opportunity to go on a $14,000 shopping spree with none other than the 2009 All-Star Race winner Tony Stewart. From the looks of things Eddie and Tony got on really well. Eddie will also receive a VIP race experience for the Coca-Cola 600 this weekend.

“I am so excited about being the Office Depot ‘At The Speed of Smart’ sweepstakes winner,” said Bell, a lifelong NASCAR® fan who deems himself the “motor-head” of his family. “In my role as district fire chief and as a small business owner of a residential construction company, having a store that carries everything from paper clips to laptop computers is very convenient. I found out about the sweepstakes during one of my weekly trips to Office Depot, and the fact that Tony Stewart is my favorite NASCAR® driver makes winning this sweepstakes very special.”

“I was absolutely thrilled to help Eddie do some damage behind the wheel of an Office Depot shopping cart,” Stewart said. “As someone who gives back to his community every day through his job as a firefighter, Eddie is a very deserving winner and I think he’s going to have a great race weekend experience.”

Bell, who has been a firefighter in Tulsa for the past 30 years, regularly watches NASCAR® race broadcasts at home but this weekend’s Coca-Cola 600 (Sunday, May 24, 5 p.m. EST, FOX) will be only the second NASCAR® race he has attended in person. During the race weekend, Bell will also receive a special on-track ride-a-long experience with Stewart in the driver’s seat.

– And since I’m already talking about Tony, did you know that you can win the firesuit he wore for the All-Star Race last weekend? As I write this the auction ends in less than 19 hours. 100% of the proceeds raised from the auction will benefit Victory Junction through The NASCAR Foundation. What I want to know is: Do they clean the firesuit and then have Tony sign it? Or is it better to have it just used and not cleaned?? I’m not sure which is better. I’m thinking if you’re like a hardcore fan you would want it as is, but that might be kinda grody. If anyone knows for sure how it’s delivered I’m curious about the details.

– For the record, the only person I want to see win the Indy 500 tomorrow is Marco Andretti. It would be soooooooooo friggin’ cool! He came so close in 2006 and I’m a big fan of family stories. I wanna see grown men cry!

Wanna know what my reaction was to the end of the Aaron’s 499 at Talladega Superspeedway?

Jaw. On. Floor.

I couldn’t believe it. Here I was thinking that Dale Earnhardt Jr. was going to win it and then Brad Keselowski comes from outta nowhere — after getting in the way all day — and takes it.

Only seven laps in we got a “Big One” that took out guys that I like, including Bowyer and Gilliland, which was highly disappointing. But I still had Dale and the hope that he had read my post and had taken it to heart. Ya never know. Plus well, Talladega is a really good track for him so I’m sure it had everything to do with that and nothing to do with me, but because he left there with a top-three finish (which is what I asked for) I like to think it was mostly me.

Anyway, I congratulate Brad on his first Sprint Cup win.

I’m so glad that Carl Edwards is A-OK and that his crash only looked absolutely horrible and didn’t result in anyone’s death. Actually because of that insane fly through the air Carl will be a guest on “The Ellen Degeneres Show” that airs tomorrow (Wednesday, April 29th, check your local listings).

Apparently Ellen thinks that Carl should take it easy from now on and gives him a new ride, a “Cruzin Cooler”, to be exact. It’s a cooler on wheels. Niiice.

I don’t know the answer to the safety questions surrounding Talladega. I’m not going to lie and say that I don’t like watching cars run 3 or 4 wide. It’s pretty cool. And yes, seeing the “The Big One” happen is interesting to me. It’s also crazy to see two cars hook-up and push each other past the entire field. It’s so unique and I like it. Whatever NASCAR needs to do to make it so that people don’t get themselves into the situations that Carl and Matt Kenseth found themselves in this past weekend they should do, but hopefully that doesn’t involve taking the banking away.

Dale Earnhardt Jr. (left), driver of the No. 88 National Guard/Amp Energy Chevrolet, congratulates Brad Keselowski (right), driver of the No. 09 Miccosukee Chevrolet, in Victory Lane on his first Sprint Cup Series win at the NASCAR Sprint Cup Series Aaron’s 499 at Talladega Superspeedway. (Photo Credit: Rusty Jarrett/Getty Images for NASCAR)

Marcos Ambrose (right), driver of the No. 47 Little Debbie/Kingsford/Clorox Toyota talks with team co-owner Brad Daugherty (left) during Friday’s first practice for the NASCAR Sprint Cup Series Aaron’s 499 at Talladega Superspeedway. (Photo Credit: Jerry Markland/Getty Images for NASCAR)

David Ragan, driver of the No. 6 Discount Tire Ford, celebrates his first NASCAR national racing series win Saturday in Victory Lane after capturing the checkered flag at the NASCAR Nationwide Series Aaron’s 312 at Talladega Superspeedway. (Photo Credit: Rusty Jarrett/Getty Images for NASCAR)

Tony Stewart, driver of the No. 14 Old Spice Chevrolet, waves to the fans following driver introductions and before the start of Sunday’s NASCAR Sprint Cup Series Aaron’s 499 at Talladega Superspeedway. (Photo Credit: Todd Warshaw/Getty Images)

Mike Skinner and his No. 5 Bad Boy Mowers Toyota team celebrate winning the O’Reilly Auto Parts 250 at Kansas Speedway. The win was Skinner’s first of the season and the first for the team since becoming Randy Moss Motorsports last summer. (Photo Credit: Darrell Ingham/Getty Images)

Tony Stewart, driver of the No. 14 Old Spice/Office Depot Chevrolet chats with former teammate Denny Hamlin, driver of the No. 11 FedEx Toyota in the garage during Friday’s practice for the NASCAR Sprint Cup Series Aaron’s 499 at Talladega Superspeedway. Earlier in the day, Stewart held a news conference about the 2009 Prelude to the Dream. (Photo Credit: Rusty Jarrett/Getty Images for NASCAR)

How to make me cry at the end of a race:

1.) Be a respected driver and a generally nice guy.

2.) Be the oldest man to win a NASCAR Sprint Cup race since 1993.

3.) Climb out of your car and head straight to your crew chief, a man that has idolized you since he was a kid, and thank him for getting you to Victory Lane after 4 winless years.

4.) Look into the television camera and thank your wife for letting you go racing again after you said you’d retire.

5.) Greet all of the drivers and crew members who come over to Victory Lane to congratulate you with a warm smile.

Yes, Mark Martin knows how to make me cry. I wasn’t bawling but I did get weepy. It was a special moment and I am so incredibly happy that I got to see it. Congratulations to the No. 5 Car Quest Kellogg Chevolet team for putting on an awesome show last night.

AJ Allmendinger shares a moment with team owner Richard Petty after the team announced Allmendinger has signed a contract to remain at Richard Petty Motorsports through the end of 2010. (Photo Credit: Todd Warshaw/Getty Images)

Crew members for Greg Biffle’s No. 16 Ford celebrate winning the Bashas’ Supermarkets 200 at Phoenix International Raceway. (Photo Credit: Todd Warshaw/Getty Images)

Subway Fresh Fit 500 Grand Marshall Michael Strahan and Carl Edwards share a laugh in the media center before the race. (Photo Credit: Todd Warshaw/Getty Images)

The cacti always look like they’re flipping me off.

Track conditions changed drastically as the sun set and the final portion of the Subway Fresh Fit 500 at Phoenix International Raceway was run under the lights. (Photo Credit: Chris Graythen/Getty Images for NASCAR)

Congratulations to Jeff Gordon for winning the Samsung 500 last weekend at Texas Motor Speedway!

It was exactly what I was waiting for and I’m so glad he’s got a win under him to break that insanely long losing streak he was on. The curious thing is that I think Jeff’s daughter Ella, who will turn two this June, is more popular than he is these days. What did all the fans (okay, maybe it was just the women) want to see when he got into victory lane? Ella of course. What did we get? No Ella! What is up with that? So now Jeff has to win again with Ella on hand so that we’ll all get to see her in victory lane with her daddy. I might collapse from the insane cuteness of it all but it’d be worth it.

During the race I listened to Dale Earnhardt Jr.’s radio using NASCAR.com’s TrackPass RaceView. I have to admit that I did doze off at one point, and then awoke to hear Dale saying something about how the orange Gatorade gets really sweet as the race wears on and he thinks they should add more water to it. To which I said to myself “What?”

In other news…

– My guest post on the NASCAR This Week site is up and you should definitely check it out. They chose a bunch of NASCAR bloggers to fill in for Monte Dutton while he was off this week on furlough.

NASCAR driver Ryan Newman (left) fishes with country music artist Josh Turner during Aaron’s Fish & Fun at the Races at Texas Motor Speedway on April 4, 2009 in Fort Worth, Texas. (Photo by Ronald Martinez/Getty Images for Texas Motor Speedway)

(Left to right) NASCAR Sprint Cup Series driver Brian Vickers talks about his No. 83 Red Bull Toyota with New Orleans Saints running back Reggie Bush before Sunday’s Samsung 500 at Texas Motor Speedway in Fort Worth, Texas. (Photo Credit: Jason Smith/Getty Images for NASCAR)

The complete Foreigner set list from someone who was actually there:
Double Vision
Head Games
Cold As Ice
Feels Like The First Time
Urgent
Juke Box Hero
I Want To Know What Love Is
Hot Blooded

Lead vocalist Kelly Hansen of the band Foreigner performs during the AMDRO Fire Ant Bait Pre-Race Show prior to the NASCAR Sprint Cup Series Samsung 500 at Texas Motor Speedway on April 5, 2009 in Fort Worth, Texas. (Photo by Tom Pennington/Getty Images for Texas Motor Speedway)

I’m surprised Jimmie Johnson didn’t come over with one of his Kobalt tools and try to finish the job for Jeff.

Jeff Gordon, driver of the #24 DuPont Chevrolet, adds his name to the Wall of Champions after winning the NASCAR Sprint Cup Series Samsung 500 at Texas Motor Speedway on April 5, 2009 in Fort Worth, Texas. (Photo by Jason Smith/Getty Images for Texas Motor Speedway)

Kyle Busch (R), driver of the #18 Snickers Toyota, poses with his girlfriend Samantha Sarcinella in victory lane after winning the NASCAR Nationwide Series O’Reilly 300 at Texas Motor Speedway on April 4, 2009 in Fort Worth, Texas. (Photo by Rusty Jarrett/Getty Images for Texas Motor Speedway)

Ya know, like actual racing with passing and everything.

I know it’s late to be writing about the Goody’s Fast Pain Relief 500 at Martinsville but I had some things to say, and some photos to post, so better late than never right?

– Jimmie Johnson’s win on Sunday was his first for the season but it didn’t feel like that to me. It felt like I was watching a continuation of the 2008 season and I didn’t like that. It’s just boring; I want someone else to win except the same freaking handful of people.

– The race itself was very good. There was passing and the distinct possibility that somebody other than Jimmie could have won it. So I did appreciate that aspect of it. Denny Hamlin is growing on me.

– As the cameras cut to various people during the invocation and the singing of the National Anthem I remember thinking to myself “Who is that person hanging on to Jeff Gordon? Why is she… Oh, wait, that’s Ingrid!” Jeff’s wife, Ingrid, cut her hair like really, really short and I can’t say I approve of it. Not that it’s any of my business, she’s a beautiful girl but I liked it better long.

– I would like to thank Fox Sports for not showing another Digger & Friends episode this week. I am fine with Digger as a graphic element to showcase their embedded-in-the-ground camera but everything else is incredibly pointless. If I wanted to watch cartoons I’d watch the Cartoon Network, not a NASCAR race.

– Something that has nothing to do with racing, I got the new Keith Urban CD “Defying Gravity” this week and it is so freaking good! Although Keith did come up with the Digger theme song I am choosing to overlook that serious infraction because this man has put together some awesome music that I’m sure I’ll be listening to over and over for days and months to come. If I could marry a song right now it’d be “‘Til Summer Comes Around.”

Tony Stewart signs an autograph for a fan prior to climbing into his car for the Goody’s Fast Pain Relief 500 at Martinsville Speedway. (Photo Credit: Rusty Jarrett/Getty Images for NASCAR)

Country music star Trace Adkins smiles in the flagstand before waving the green flag to start the Goody’s Fast Pain Relief 500 at Martinsville Speedway. (Photo Credit: Nick Laham/Getty Images)

awwwww.

Joey Logano signs autographs for two fans while waiting out a rain delay at Martinsville Speedway. (Photo Credit: Geoff Burke/Getty Images)

1.) His eyes are actually blue, but I love this photo ’cause it’s so color coordinated.
2.) With his head tilted to the side like that I imagine him thinking to himself “Why are you asking me the same damn questions over and over??”

Dale Earnhardt Jr. speaks with media about meetings he had during the week with team owner Rick Hendrick and crew chief Tony Eury Jr. (Photo Credit: Jerry Markland/Getty Images for NASCAR)

(L-R): Clint Bowyer, Jimmie Johnson, Ron Hornaday Jr. and Jeff Gordon discuss their Martinsville driving styles while waiting for the rain to subside. (Photo Credit: Geoff Burke/Getty Images)