Do you feel that? It’s pressure… Who knew all of this pressure would be mounting for this year’s road course race at Infineon?

There are so many names being thrown out of potential winners it’s getting crazy. I almost wish I could ditch my nephews birthday party to see it in person… almost. I have some serious objections to Juan Pablo Montoya winning this puppy. Why? Because he won’t appreciate it. After he won in Mexico earlier this year (a road course track) he said he wanted to win at an oval next. So given his charismatic and warm attitude (that’s serious sarcasm folks) I’m sure he’d be oh so ecstatic to get a win at another road course. I’m sure he’d be happy in general about winning but he’d still whine that he hadn’t won at a super speedway yet. So I don’t accept that. I don’t even want to imagine it happening.

I’d much rather see AJ Allmendinger pull out a miracle win instead. The kid can do it, if he can qualify. Keep your fingers crossed because that would just be too much fun to watch. He’s got stiff competition from ringers like Boris Said and Ron Fellows, but also a cup regular like Robby Gordon.

In other news…

– Wanna know more about Crew Chiefs? Check out the Crew Chief Club website. I just stumbled upon this site today via Larry McReynolds’ column on FoxSports.com. There isn’t a lot of daily changing information on it (except for a link to Larry Mac’s weekly columns), but still you can get some background info on some of the top Crew Chiefs in NASCAR.

– A big thank you to all of you who have filled out my quick ‘Fabulous’ survey. I really, really appreciate it. If you haven’t filled it out yet, you should… I’ll be your best friend!

Welcome to The Fast and the Fabulous! This is a blog based on one woman's thoughts, opinions and experiences involving NASCAR and IndyCar.

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Here’s a practical tip for Dale Earnhardt Jr. fans… You’re going to want to purchase some Goo Gone to help peel off those red #8 stickers from your cars & trucks. Rumors are a swirlin’ that his next sponsor won’t be Budweiser. It never hurts to be prepared.

These days the man with the info is Darrell Waltrip… If you want to know what possibilities lie ahead for Dale Jr. just ask DW.
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Dale Jr.’s one choice; Kyle Busch’s many options [FoxSports on MSN]
D.W. Hints that Dale Jr.’s New Sponsor Won’t Be in a Red Can [Racing Milestones]

I walked into my local grocery store last night and saw Dale Earnhardt Jr. I did a quick double-take but it was only a cardboard cutout of him. I was seriously tempted to find the store manager to see if I could put down dibs on taking the cardboard Junior home with me. If you could live in my brain you’d be adequately entertained by some of the thoughts that run through it.

Anyway… It seems that the real Dale Jr. is feeding his love for Elvis by hosting the first night of the “Elvis Music & Movies” series at Graceland on August 13th, 2007 (that’s a Monday for those of you thinking about going). They’re going to show one of Elvis’ movies “Viva Las Vegas,” which happens to be my favorite Elvis movie. Not so much because of Elvis but more because of Ann Margaret and her song “My Rival.” I love that part, you should rent it.

So Infineon is this weekend and I’m not going to the races. This is the only race that comes to my area but I have to pass on it this year so that I can attend my youngest nephew’s birthday in La La Land (aka Los Angeles). This is how great of an aunt I am, I am sacrificing the chance to see my fave drivers up close in order to celebrate the day my nephew turns 6. Family is important to me and honestly I can get better views of this particular race by watching it on TV.

Infineon is a very fun place to watch a race, but you really have to be in shape in order to get around that place. It’s hilly and only certain locations around the track give the best views. And if you’re going to try and track down the drivers after the race for autographs, be prepared to hike up the hill to the helicopter pad.

I’m sad that I can’t go, and I’ll be extra miffed if Dale Jr. manages to pull out a top 5 finish and I wasn’t there to see it. I like this quote from him about Infineon:

“This weekend is important to me because I’m sick of hearing people say ‘oh, he can’t drive on a road course.’ We’ve been so close here before and have always come away with some sort of issue that takes away from what we can really do. I want a top-10 so bad here, I can taste it. We finished 11th two years in a row and led some laps. It broke my heart that I didn’t get to race the Corvette there in 2004 because of the crash during the morning warm-up. I was angry because it cost that team a chance to race after they had been so good to me, but also because I was really learning a lot and had improved my road racing skills.

Then, in 2005, we had a car I thought had a chance to win the Cup race but we were trying a new transmission and it locked-up on the first lap and I was in the wall. That was so disappointing - and it was even worse when we fixed the car and I went back out and was still as fast as anyone in a car that was beat-up and taped together. It was frustrating, but it was another sign that I can do this. Last year, we passed more than 15 cars on track, moved into the top-10 and then got taken out by a ringer who was driving like a madman. We tested for a day at VIR (Virginia Intl. Raceway) a few weeks back, and I think this is the weekend we get can get a finish that this team deserves.”

In other news…

– Here are the things I wish for AJ Allmendinger: 1.) He qualifies for the race at Infineon this weekend and 2.) He places somewhere in the top 10 at the very least.

– NASCAR.COM’s Duane Cross writes about Liz Allison’s soon-to-be-released book (September 7th to be exact) The Girl’s Guide to Winning a NASCAR Driver (Secrets to Grabbing His Attention and Stealing His Heart)… The book provides info on how drivers met their wives and how to grab a drivers attention. Check out the article it’s a fun read, especially the part about Kurt Busch and a horse’s behind.

– Thanks to a reader I now have a link to a photo of Marco Andretti Shirtless… Your endless Google searches can end here.

– Another Infineon bit… Wanna meet Clint Bowyer? Here’s the lowdown on how you can this Friday, June 22nd in Petaluma, Calif.

On behalf of Jack Daniel’s, Bowyer will appear on the mezzanine above the Tolay restaurant at the Sheraton Sonoma County – Petaluma Hotel on Friday, June 22 from 7-8:30 p.m. The hotel is located at 745 Baywood Drive in Petaluma. Bowyer will be on hand to greet race fans and sign autographs.

So guess what! Jeff Gordon won’t be needing Mark Martin’s services afterall. Gordon’s wife, non-supermodel Ingrid Vandebosch, gave birth today to their daughter, Ella Sofia Gordon. The following is the official press release:

DAUGHTER OF GORDON AND VANDEBOSCH BORN TODAY

NEW YORK, N.Y. (June 20, 2007) - Earlier today, Jeff Gordon and Ingrid Vandebosch welcomed a new daughter into the world. Ella Sofia Gordon was born at 9:09 a.m., weighed 7 pounds, 1ounce and was 20 inches long. “It’s been an absolutely incredible experience,” Gordon said in a statement that appeared on www.jeffgordon.com. “Ingrid came through amazingly and we’re both really happy and overjoyed. We can’t wait to get home and start our lives together as a family.”

The four-time NASCAR Cup Series champion will travel to Northern California later this week and is scheduled to participate in all on-track activities at Infineon Raceway, site of this weekend’s NASCAR NEXTEL Cup Series race.

Where to begin… First I guess I’ll express my surprise that it had been over a year since Carl Edwards had won a Cup race. I didn’t realize it had been that long, so good for him. The fun thing about Carl Edwards is his mom. She’s at all of his races and she’s the only NASCAR driver’s mom that I can spot instantly. Like if I saw her at the grocery store I’d be like “hey there’s Carl Edwards’ mom!” If it’s anybody else’s mom I have no clue, their son would have to be standing next to them for me to put it together. I don’t know what it is about her but she stands out. I think it’s her hair. She’s got great hair. Or, duh, it could just be that she’s always there. I dunno though… Some of those guys’ girlfriends and wives are always there and I wouldn’t be able to pick them out of a crowd. It could just depend on who it is.

Ok, I totally went off on a weird tangent there.

In other news…

– I’ve been watching “Fast Cars & Superstars” (on ABC) here and there. I have it Tivo’d so I can watch it whenever. I like the fact that they’ve done this show period, because it proves that there’s so much more to NASCAR than just turning a wheel. While it doesn’t go into the whole strategy part of it, I think people get a sense of the skill involved.

– How nice was it to see Michael Waltrip back in a Cup race? And he finished 10th no less! That was very cool. I’m happy for him. It feels like his whole season has been marred by his little off track accident and the Daytona 500 shenanigans, which is really sad. I’d like to see his team be successful. I know they can be it’ll just take some time. But I just miss the old funny & slaphappy Mikey that we used to see every week.

– Casey Mears. He’s a guy that’s steadily moving up the points standings every week. At one point this year, a few weeks ago I believe, he was in 34th place and now he’s up to 19th. Ya never know, if they keep this up we could see Casey in the Chase this year. That’d be very, very cool.

– Please tell me I’m not the only person who dislikes Marc Fein and Bill Weber? I’d trade both of them in for Mike Joy and Allen Bestwick any day. They’re sooo annoying. I don’t understand Weber, it seems like he’s yelling all the time. He’s just too loud. And Fein seems like he’s not listening to people ’cause his comments after they make a point never seem to match up. Ugh. Luckily we only have 4 more races of them until we’re on to the ESPN/ABC coverage.

– The topic of Dale Earnhardt Jr.’s move to Hendrick Motorsports is starting to annoy even me. And I’m a big Dale Jr. fan. Maybe it’s because they seemed to extend the pre-race show for an extra hour and filled it with an interview of Junior and Rick Hendrick that shed absolutely NO new light on the situation. I’d rather they talk about Mikey Waltrip making it back into a race, or the Red Bull boys managing to qualify every week after a slow start to the season. Or why Juan Pablo Montoya seems to have stalled (which is totally fine by me) or what’s going on with Jeremy Mayfield (where the heck is he??).

– In case you’re thirsty for more speculation on the ramifications of Junior’s move to Hendrick, then you should check out this article “Is Dale Earnhardt Jr.’s big move good for NASCAR?” on Slate.com by John Swansburg. He digs my blog, so I’m giving him props. But really it’s a good article and you should read it.

This guy doesn’t get it because he doesn’t want to.

NASCAR numbing to Couch

I CAN REMAIN silent no longer. Couch Slouch has sat here over the last generation, as America’s Viewer, and has slumped over watching the unconscionable, unspeakable, uncontrollable growth of NASCAR.

I would rather be stuck on I-95 behind someone driving 47 mph with their left-turn signal on than watch another nanosecond of a Nextel Cup race.

They drive in circles, then they stop because of a caution flag, then they drive in circles again, then they stop for another caution flag. This goes on for several hours, and then it’s suddenly over; it is oddly reminiscent of the Carmen Electra-Dennis Rodman marriage.

Man, this country needs to wake up and smell something other than an oil spill.

Because one day, while millions of slack-jawed Americans are lying around scratching themselves and blankly staring at a senseless 750-horsepower spectacle, the Statue of Liberty might be floating out to sea.

Fox and ESPN and now TNT seem to do a terrific job of blanketing NASCAR — I just have no idea ever of what’s going on. At any given moment, it sounds like the hog-calling contest at the county fair.

And yet, crowds of 150,000 gather at speedways to take it all in (aided, I’m sure, by the occasional beer) and crowds at home also gather in equally impressive Nielsen numbers (aided, I’m sure, by the occasional beer).

I’ve never gotten it, and I never will get it (and, trust me, I am often aided by the occasional beer — well, actually, the occasional glass of Beni di Batasiolo Barolo 2003).

I wouldn’t care if Michael Waltrip got ticketed at the Pocono 500 for going too slow.

I wouldn’t care if Dale Earnhardt Jr. left DEI for the USO.

I wouldn’t care if Jeff Gordon skipped a race for my child’s birth.

I just don’t care about improperly mounted rear wings and adjusting air-fuel mixture and raising the track bar and planting the throttle down and slipping out of the groove and working the wheel and cranking it up and finessing the gas and new cars that don’t like wedge and broken exhaust pipes and faulty fuel-pump cables and 41/2-inch splitter rules and right front tires blowing out and cooling air flow and melting foam and floor boards and rollbar paint and heat shields and forward bite and rubber knots and debris cautions and brake systems and brake heat and brake dust and Turn 4 and tobacco-chewing crew chiefs and the No. 24 DuPont Chevrolet.

I don’t want to hear another word about the Car of Tomorrow unless it is an electric vehicle that doubles as a cappuccino maker when you turn the ignition key.

I love Joe Gibbs, but if Joe Gibbs Racing were to show up at my home on the Fourth of July, I’d point those boys to the nearest Arby’s drive-thru.

There is no upside — none — to watching Jimmie Johnson and Kevin Harvick and Kurt Busch bang around the track for several hundred miles or so. Now, put those fellas on the Santa Monica Freeway at rush hour with a screaming baby in the backseat, and then you might have some good TV.

Anyway, I hope I’ve at least put a seed of doubt into NASCAR regulars about how you spend your quality time here in America. Plus, I’ll do you another solid; here’s a list other things you should do before you tumble into another NASCAR race:

-Read a book.

-Key the letters “MPG” onto an SUV.

-Listen to the “The Very Best of the Lovin’ Spoonful” while eating Ben & Jerry’s New York Super Fudge Chunk.

-Tap a person on the shoulder who is speaking on a cell phone at the table next to you in the restaurant, ask him politely if you can see the phone for just a second, take the phone into the restaurant’s kitchen and drop it into the nearest pot of boiling water. Add salt, as needed, and stir occasionally.

-Play some seven-card stud with your daughter.

Boogity, boogity, boogity, my butt. Shuffle up and deal!

Norman Chad is a freelance writer based in Los Angeles. Send your comments about him to Turn2@angnewspapers.com.

Contact him at asktheslouch@aol.com.

Here’s my email to him:

Ya know, it’s great that you don’t like NASCAR… but don’t crap all over people who do. You obviously haven’t taken the time to understand the sport of racing. Yes, there aren’t guys hitting each other on purpose or throwing balls into hoops, but there is a ton of strategy, engineering and strength involved in winning a race.

If you’d take longer than 5 seconds to come up with your argument you’d know that. Also, I take offense to your insinuation that NASCAR fans are wasting precious time with their family by spending time watching races at home or at the track. That couldn’t be farther from the truth. NASCAR is incredibly family friendly. Who cares if a father and son spend time watching a race together? At least they’re spending time together (at all) doing something they love.

You’re giving the sport short shrift that it doesn’t deserve and that’s really sad. Stop acting like you’re so above it all, ’cause you’re not. You’re just a dude like everybody else.
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If you disagree with him and agree with me (even in the least bit) I implore you to write to this guy ASAP.

This is seriously my biggest pet peeve. I can’t get over this stuff. Sports Elitist Nerds! Grr!!